Happy Easter!

HAPPY EASTER!  :)  He is Risen!

                               

worthy of the calling

[Warning: Actually thoughtful post.  No pictures.  Just words.  May be too serious for some.  You have been warned.]


This is by no means my first blog.  That was a fun place over at LiveJournal, where to this day, the interface is how I set it to be.  (You can learn from that, Facebook!  Changing things every few months.  It's annoying.  Don't fix what ain't broke.)

Anyway, when Google started taking over the world, I started a blog on Blogger named after a song by Bebo Norman.  I didn't blog too much since those were the awesomely wonder years of college where I was having too much fun in real life to blog.  (Not that I'm not having fun in real life now.  It's different!)  :]  Since all the blogs you own or are a part of show up in your Blogger dashboard, I saw that old blog and browsed through it.  Nothing terribly interesting until I came upon a post I posted on January 3, 2007.  I had just attended Urbana '06, a giant Christian conference aimed at college students that only occurred every three years.

This was the post:

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Many went to Urbana expecting to be told by God what they are to do with their lives.

I received my calling at Urbana '06.

I did not expect thunder and lightning to reveal a moment of revelation.

He did not give it to me.

I had no expectations for Urbana '06.

Yet God exceeded them.

He answered unprayed prayers.

He spoke to me.

He did not tell me what to go to grad school for.

He did not tell me what my career, if I have one, will be like.

He did not tell me who I am going to marry.

He did not tell me whether I will get into grad school.

He did not tell me whether I will get a job.

But He did tell me what my calling is in life, which is to live for Him.

Anything else is really secondary.

"Live a life worthy of the calling." ~ Ephesians 4:1

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As I read that today, I kinda blinked and then smiled cause... WOW.  I went to grad school, I got married, and I have a job.  Hindsight is always, of course, more interesting, and to stand on "the other side" looking back on what I didn't know... all sort of coming to pass since then.  But the greatest reminder which I often forget... is that back then... I "figured out" what my calling is in life -- to live a life worthy of the calling.  Something solid in the fluidity of the unknown.  Is it better to know that and not all the stuff I know now?  Probably.  But I should make something of that --- to know all those uncertainties back then... and to live a life worthy of the calling.  Of course there will be all sorts of other things I don't know now that will make sense later.  :]

Blogs are kind of fun to look back on and go "what was I thinking?!" but also to see how far and how much we've grown.  The things we've learned.  Our experiences.  Those raw in-the-moment emotions we went through.  In a 3 page blog post.  (Oh I know you have those!  :oP)

I'm gonna go think some more about this while I cook dinner.  Maybe.

Do you ever go back on old blog posts?  Or {gasp} those things called journals with the paper where used a pen...?

                           

love mercy part 2

  A few weeks ago, I wrote about  "Love Mercy: A Mother and Daughter's Journey from the American Dream to the Kingdom of God."  I finally finished it last week and here are two more quotes I liked and found thought provoking that I want to share, both from Lisa Samson (the mom):

How much different would my life be if I ran my actions through fewer filters?  Can you imagine Jesus being asked to heal and responding," Oh I was on my way to the synagogue.  I'll catch you when I'm finished, and we'll take care of that disease then."  What would it look like if I lived in imitation of the Father, who owns the cattle on a thousand hills and says his mercies are from everlasting to everlasting?

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God's great love for me means I can't misrepresent that love to anyone else.  His great love is the model for how to run our charities and churches.  Above all, his love shows us how to love each other.

Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.  By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.  ~  John 13:34-35
                                        

love mercy

Before we left for Christmas, I randomly scoured the shelves at our library and picked up two small paperback books, since our copy of The Path of Daggers (WoT book 8) is like... the size of a hardback encyclopedia (too heavy for the airplane!) 

I picked up "Crossing Washington Square" by Joanne Rendell (oh my, it's only $2.26 on Amazon)

and "Love Mercy: A Mother and Daughter's Journey from the American Dream to the Kingdom of God" by Lisa Samson and Ty Samson


I finished "Crossing Washington Square" on our flight to Oregon and it was okay.  Girlie fiction?  haha.  But I only started "Love Mercy" after we got back, since I thought I should read it before I returned it.  I'm slowly moving through it, but in short it's about a mom (Lisa) and Ty (her daughter) whose comfortable lives get shaken by God and they are challenged to do more for His Kingdom, starting with an experience and journey to Africa, in particular Swaziland, which has the highest AIDS rate in the world.  This section, by Lisa (page 35-26), resonated with me:

"Jesus couldn't really be followed, could he?  I was supposed to believe in him, sure, but follow?  Nobody really expected any of us to do that, did they?

In the name of grace (a wonderful thing to be sure), I'd watered down faith to mere intellectual assent.  I didn't have to follow Jesus, really -- I had only to believed he was the Son of God and go on my merry way.  Believing correctly was one more thing to check off my to-do list.  But Jesus didn't talk like that.  Not even close.  Nor did James, who wrote, Even the demons believe... and shudder" (James 2:19).

Was God really calling me to be conformed to the image of his Son?  Wasn't it more like a suggestion?  What if I just wanted to make sure I went to heaven and not hell?  What if I simply valued church for the fellowship, the children's programs, and the potlucks? 

What God talking about actually changing my life?  Really?

No wonder the Pharisees hated Jesus.  No wonder the rich man went away sad."

Too often, we are armed with our Sunday school answers and we may have a thorough knowledge of the Bible or be good people but the actual life changing stuff?  That's scary.  I chuckled at the line, "Wasn't it more like a suggestion?" to follow Jesus, but at the same time, it's true.  It's easy for me to "believe" and do church things and be good and serve others.  But to give up my comforts and to truly love others and to allow God to change my life?  It's a lot easier to go on my merry way and think this is how God wants me to live.  Which could be.  But I think deep down inside, I know my laziness and selfishness gets in the way* of all God wants to do, all. the. time.



*Though not in the sense that my laziness and selfishness are obstacles to God because... He can do anything He wants.